Worse than another
by Mayy-chan
Summary: There was only three things that he liked. And at the same time he hated those things. What's Kagome got to do with this? InuKag - AU - One-shot. I suc at summaries. Please read and rewiew !


A/N: I just feel like writing something a little darker and the idea of making Inuyasha a total lunatic is so tempting that I just can't ignore it. If you don't like it, I won't force you to read it. Actually I don't even know how this is going to end. The plot is developing in my oversized head while I'm writing. Let's just see how this goes, nee?

Okay .. and just one more time: This is MY fic. Inuyasha is embittered and insane. Just leave that fact alone.

Disclaimer: I do NOT own anyone in this fic .. growl

Worse than another

And so are the raindrops falling down from the sky, and no one stops them. They can't stop them, and not everyone want's to. The darkening of the sky and gathering of the clouds has always been kept as a symbol of melancholy. Darkness.

Why it is that the black color is so connected to the impression of dreariness? Shadows. Are they the ones that make those impressions alive?

You can never know about shadows, 'cause you can't see through them without any light. And the place where you cannot see can be hiding more and more horrid creatures.

Shadows are black – black is a dark color.

The pure evil can be assumed to live in the dark; watching and waiting its move. Though, why couldn't evil live in another color? "Evil runs in the blood", they say. So, why not the red color that is kept as a symbol of love and passion? Evil could damn well live in the red color.

* * *

There weren't many things that Inuyasha liked. You could easily cut the number of those things to three. Still, every thing that he liked, he also hated. The rain was one of them.

It made the dog demon wet, but in the rain he could be alone. The rain reminded him about the most precious thing to him. The thing that he wouldn't want to be without. Without it he'd become weaker, bitter and rotten, and in the end he'd vanish and would no longer exist.

There was only one person in the universe who could accept that fact. And that would cost to the person a big time.

The sky rumbled. Inuyasha looked up to the rain with his pure amber eyes. He sighed. He was bored. Soon it would be the time again. The man couldn't wait, but he knew that without patience it couldn't be a success. This night he had been planning a long time and much longer the day after.

The half-demon looked to the city hall towards the big clock. Twelve past ten, it said.

_Twelve past ten, eh?_ And Kagome wouldn't be let out of work before 1 am. There was too much time. Inuyasha was bored.

At that very moment he heard sounds coming towards him.

''Satoru! Satoru, stop!'' yelled a voice of a woman.

The voice got louder and soon Inuyasha felt something hit his legs. The man did no sign of moving from his spot. Slowly he turned his eyes to stare the little boy wearing green colored rain jacket. The boy stared at him openly. First the boy looked annoyed, then confused and finally, feared. Something in Inuyasha's stare scared him. He had never seen the same kind of eyes. So cold and unsympathetic.

''Satoru!'' A middle-age woman arrived next to the boy and grabbed his hand.

''I said that you shouldn't leave and go running all by yourself, didn't I? It is late!''

The boy called Satoru did not move his gaze from the man wearing a black coat and a cap over his head. That is when the woman seemed to notice the man too. She lifted his boy up and started to clear the boy's clothes from the mud and dirt. She didn't even look at the man even though she started talking up to him.

''I apologize mister if my son did any harm to you. He didn't notice you. With this darkness and all… it was an accident.''

Inuyasha didn't break the eye contact with the boy, but he turned his head towards the woman while he said:

''It happens.''

The woman glanced up to the man and then nodded, but hesitated a little before she started to drag his son towards the building where they had come.

''Stop'', Inuyasha said suddenly. His voice was stern and commanding, but not angry.

The pair stopped uncertain of what the strange man was going to say or do. The man kneeled and picked something from the ground. Then he took four heavy steps towards the boy and his mother. When he got near enough, he kneeled in front of Satoru and handed him a dirty, green rain hat.

Then there was silence between the group.

"Well? Don't lose it again, sonny.''

Satoru grabbed his hat from Inuyasha and almost with the speed of light he had vanished inside the building with his mother. Inuyasha stood up and growled. The kid had stared him. The rain pattered even louder against Inuyasha's hood and then Inuyasha made his final decision about the night's schedule.

He had the time.

* * *

Kagome Higurashi glanced at the clock again. It was only third time that night.

He would come tonight. Usually he comes exactly when she could leave work, but never could she wait until then. The others should understand for Kagome only saw him ones in the month.

Deep inside Kagome knew all along what Inuyasha _really_ was… and by the time she'd found herself fallen in love with him, she had realized her own fate.

Everything had started five years ago, when Inuyasha had stepped to the bar that Kagome was working. By the second Kagome had laid her eyes on him, she had known that seeking her way to him would cause trouble. His eyes had told that to her. _Stay away_.

That's what they had told, but Kagome was too curious.

Something in Inuyasha had fascinated her. Maybe it was the mystery, maybe it was the behavior of his. At first he didn't talk to anyone, except when he came to the counter and ordered double-whisky with ice. Inuyasha had come to the same bar every month. In the exact same day. Every month he came to the counter, and waited patiently, that Kagome would come and ask him what he would like to have. And every time he'd ordered the same drink.

In the end it had developed a habit, which they kept doing every time they met. Once one of Kagome's colleagues had come to the counter and asked him what he'd like to have, but he'd refused to say anything, unless Kagome would come. The routine had been continuing every month, until Kagome had decided to start talking to the stranger. After that, there was no way back.

Every time they met, they had become more and more attached to each other. Finally Kagome had invited Inuyasha to her place after she'd get out of work. Inuyasha didn't mind and… well, we all know how it ended.

Now Kagome was exhausted. The time didn't move anywhere and she'd have to be at work at least 40 minutes. She couldn't leave Sango all by herself at the counter for all the people in the bar.

Suddenly the front door opened and a man came in. The same man Kagome had been waiting for a whole month. The woman kept her face as still as every time they met. She wouldn't be allowed to slip from the routine, as wasn't Inuyasha either. Sango was delivering drinks to someone with her tray, so Kagome was left alone to counter.

Inuyasha neared the counter, pulled a stool in front of him and sat on it. Kagome looked at him casually.

"And what would you like to have, mister?" She asked according to the routine.

Inuyasha flipped his cap off over his head allowing his black hair to come out.

"A double-whisky with ice, please miss."

At this point Kagome leaned a bit forward.

"Thirsty, aren't we? I doubt your intentions aren't clean this time, mister?"

Inuyasha too leaned a bit closer.

"Well, what if you'd find that out, miss?"

"Oooh, I'm afraid I don't have enough time tonight, mister."

Inuyasha once again brought his head a little closer to Kagome so that their faces were only a couple of inches away from each other.

"Every moment is another chance, dear. Every moment."

The couple stared at each other a moment, then Kagome let go of her role and melted into a warm smile.

"You're early."

"I wanted to see you."

Kagome pressed her lips against Inuyashas and made him smile too. She was the only person in the whole world that could make him smile. Finally she broke the kiss.

"You know very well that I'm stuck in here for at least half an hour."

Inuyasha growled. He narrowed his eyes and examined Kagome as to think, should he eat her boiled or grilled. This thought made Kagome giggle and she turned in her spot, made a drink for the man and handed that to him very professionally.

"It's on the house."

Inuyasha stared at the glass for a moment, and then moved his gaze back to the woman grinning on the other side of the counter.

"I ordered a double-whisky with ice."

"Yeah, you did", Kagome said in passing. Inuyasha glared at her for a moment.

"Listen woman, this is ice-water."

"Exactly."

"You're mean."

Kagome made a face and then smiled mysteriously.

"A real devil for a woman, eh?"

Inuyasha didn't want to wait another second, so he got up from his chair. He circled around the counter to Kagome and buried her into his arms.

"Let's go away."

Kagome knew very well what Inuyasha meant and she even considered playing stupid for a moment, but let go of the idea as she felt Inuyasha breathe in the scent of her hair.

"No… I can't leave Sango alone yet. There are still a lot of people here."

"But you can leave me all by myself for the next month?"

Kagome wanted to let go of Inuyasha, but she couldn't bring herself to do it.

"It's not my fault you vanish after every night we spend together and then return after a month and…"

Inuyasha saw where the discussion was getting at.

"And what?"

Kagome sighed, beaten.

"And make me remember why it's worth it."

Inuyasha's grin got even wider and he kissed Kagome passionately, until he decided to make his intentions clear. He trailed his kisses along Kagome's neck and whispered her ear for the last time that night:

"Let's go away."

* * *

As Kagome woke up early in the next morning, she noticed Inuyasha being up already. He had woke up and was getting dressed. Kagome smiled up at him.

"You're leaving already?"

Inuyasha turned in his spot and aimed his beautiful violet eyes to Kagome.

"I didn't know you were awake."

Kagome grabbed the remote control from the nightstand and turned on the TV to see the time.

"You silly… it's six o'clock in the morning. The sun hasn't even risen yet."

"You know I have to go."

Kagome yawned as she watched Inuyasha looking for his socks and shirt from the floor. She felt a sudden urge to giggle, but held it back.

"I think your shirt was left in the kitchen."

Inuyasha nodded and disappeared from the room.

Kagome shifted her position and sighed again. She knew why Inuyasha 'had' to go every morning before the sunrise. Either one of them never talked about it, but Kagome still seemed to know. And even so… she felt like she didn't regret one moment she had spent with him.

At first Kagome had though that Inuyasha was married and he was using Kagome to cheat his wife. Then again… something had told her that it couldn't be about that. There had been something else about him.

Inuyasha soon returned to the room and quickly glanced at the clock in the TV. He turned his head to the floor looking almost sad, until his face were expressionless again.

"Is there something wrong?" Kagome asked seeing man's face.

Inuyasha looked like he wanted to say something, but instead he kneeled beside her bed and stroked her midnight-black hair gently. He would miss her beautiful face and sincere happiness. Kagome was always warm and understanding to everyone, which made Inuyasha feel even more guilt. She was like an angel he'd ruin at some point. He watched at her face carefully, wanting to remember every inch and curve. Finally he spoke.

"Would you come to meet me at the park around two o'clock?"

Kagome was a little surprised.

"In the daytime?"

Inuyasha nodded.

"Why?"

"I've… got something to show you."

Kagome stayed silent for a moment, looking something from Inuyasha's eyes. She didn't know what, to be exact… and found none. She lifted her hand and stroked his cheek a little.

"Ok."

Inuyasha placed a kiss on Kagome's forehead and then got up.

"I've got to go now. I'll see you later today."

"See you."

Inuyasha had planned to be himself 'til the end, but decided to turn and open his mouth again.

"And one more thing, Kags."

"Hmm?"

"I… have never cared anyone as much as I care about you."

"Inuyasha…?"

But that was all she got to say for Inuyasha was already disappeared from the room and from the apartment. Kagome felt herself insecure. Inuyasha wasn't being himself. Usually he was already gone when Kagome woke up in the morning, but now he was acting like he really had something important to tell her.

And Kagome wasn't all sure it was a good thing.

The TV had been left open, and first Kagome didn't even notice. That is before the news started.

"…Two people died yesterday in Tokyo. The middle-aged woman's and her youngest son's bodies were found last night around 2 am from the stairs of their home, torn into pieces. According to the police the maker couldn't have been a human judging from the injuries of the victims. The marks more surely are referring to some kind of beast with long claws, who had attached to the woman and the child in the middle of the rain. Next, we have a little comment from our animal expert, Yoko Tanaki."

Kagome rose up to stare at the TV screen -shocked.

"The maker of the deaths cannot be said precisely, because the injuries are just too serious to be caused by any kind of dog-animals, and still… no animals tear so planned and clean, as that someone has done here. Even so we cannot prove that the criminal has been a human, nor can we speak about murder yet. Back to the studio." "Thank you, Yoko. And then about the weather, which seems to be much prettier than yesterday…"

Kagome turned off the TV and felt herself shaking.

She knew her time had come. She had that feeling at that very moment. There was only one name sailing in her thoughts unchangeable, with only one thought.

_Inuyasha. Is it time already?_

* * *

Inuyasha grinned himself. He had planned everything out. Every single detail and they were all in a perfect order now.

Kagome wasn't like the others. Like the boy… Satoru, or that woman. She was so different and important, that no one of his previous doings could win this. The hanyou knew that the woman loved him more than her own life, and that would cost her big.

Then his mind became misty again. There were only two things he liked besides the rain, and also hated at the same time. He loved Kagome more than himself ever. Kagome had gotten him to think about a different kind of future. Inuyasha had seriously considered if Kagome could accept him as himself. As a half-demon, who would change to a human only during new moon?

Yes, Kagome may possibly accept him as himself, but then the third thing he liked, would've dropped away.

And that was one thing the hanyou couldn't accept.

He liked the rain - he hated it. He loved Kagome -he hated her. He enjoyed killing -he hated himself for it.

* * *

Kagome was waiting Inuyasha on a park bench.

She felt the tension grow with every passing second. Still, she was being as calm as a normal person could be at a situation like that. She knew what was going to happen. She knew that Inuyasha had believed her when she had said she'd give up her life for him, if she had to. And now she'd prove it to him.

Yellow leaves where flying and swinging in the air as Inuyasha appeared at the side of the park.

Kagome's eyes got wide as she noticed how beautiful, long silver hair the hanyou really owned. His hair was flapping in the slight wind like a flag, as Inuyasha captured Kagome's chocolate brown eyes to his own, amber ones.

The woman decided to smile and she waved happily to Inuyasha. The man turned his gaze to ground. Hanyou felt a tingle of conscience as he had saw Kagome's reaction and he hesitated a moment. His thoughts were a mixture of love and hate.

He loved Kagome. She might accept him as a half-demon. But then he'd have to stop killing. He hated Kagome. She made him hesitate. Kagome would sacrifice her life to prove Inuyasha something he already knew. Kagome'd never hate him. If he'd stop killing, he wouldn't exist anymore. It wouldn't be him, it would be someone, who gave up his grudge for mankind and replaced it with a mortal. He wanted revenge for humans, who had never accepted him as himself. Not even, when he was an orphan child.

However, if he'd kill Kagome, like he had planned carefully, there would be only two things left, of what he liked. And plus, he'd hate himself even more, than ever. If he'd let Kagome live, he'd be slipping from his rules and again, he'd hate himself. He loved and hated Kagome. He loved and hated himself.

No one could help him. Kagome would be dead sooner or later by Inuyasha.

"I quit my work at the bar."

Inuyasha felt himself startled when he heard Kagome's voice. He lifted his gaze from the ground and noticed that the woman had walked almost right in front of him. Kagome smiled carefully and encouraging as she always did. She came a little closer again and touched Inuyasha's cheek lightly with the back of her hand.

"It's ok."

Inuyasha was mute. He memorized Kagome's touch, but didn't say anything.

Kagome sighed. She wasn't scared anymore.

"I won't take back my words. I said I'd give up my life for you. I'm yours. I love you."

Inuyasha forced a smile on his face, even though it wasn't even hard after he heard Kagome's words.

"I love you, Kagome."

* * *

"And again, there's been found two bodies in the middle of Tokyo. The police believe that the ring of deaths has finally, after five years, come to an end. They say they suspect that the other one of the dead ones has caused all the unsolved deaths. This afternoon there were found bodies of a young woman and a man, curled up together in the central park. The woman is doubt to have died by the man, who soon after killed himself too. Bodies were found by the dead woman's colleague, who had worriedly went looking for her friend to find out why she had quit in her job in the same morning. The man's fingerprints match with the prints found earlier from the crime scenes of other murders, so there aren't to be expected any same kind of cruel, and planned deaths to innocent people. And then something about sports…"

I MADE IT !  
Geez, this was exhausting experience .. but I liked it  
I hope you won't kill me for making Inuyashalike that .. but I won't blame you. Let's just say I had had a rough day when I started this .. Well .. yeah, that's my only excuse. I'll promise to try to write something happier next time .. if I'll continue this .. that depends ..gasp Well, PLEASE rewiew .. I'd be so happy .. puppy eyes

Oh, and sorry for all the spelling .. um .. mistakes .. I'm not really that good in english as somepeople might say.

Mayy-chan-


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